a) How exactly do item level work and what are they linked to? What do I have to look for in order to know if I can equip and use a weapon or armor piece?
An item's stats is tied to its item level and rarity. A level 30 rare weapon (yellow) definately will have better stats than a lvl30 uncommon (blue) but lesser than a lvl30 heroic (orange). For monks, it's better to look for +dex, +str, or at least +hp gear.
b) How do I compare weapons and what is the difference between calculating 2h dps and wielding two weapons with different dps.
Check the main hand and off hand dmg when unarmed or equiping knuckles, and add the damage numbers together and compare that number to ur 2H dps.
c) How does the weapon skill directly influence my fights? Besides the mentioned 10% add at max do I for example miss about 50% if they skill is half maxed? I am trying to keep as many weapon skills as possible up - you never know if they actually all of a sudden decide to give as a weapon that is worthwhile and uber!

Besides it's just looks cool if I am fighting with a sword for kicks

Weapon Archtype skills (2H blunt, 2H slash, Hand-to-hand, etc) determine ur accuracy. Maxed skill means 95% accuracy when fighting even con. U can divide this number by 10 and the resulting figure can be used to guessitimate what level mobs u can expect to have 95% accuracy on. For example, if your 2H slash skill is 200, then u can hit lvl20 mobs w/ 95% accuracy.
d) does Item durability influence dps and/or armor bonus. Say if my weapon is not at 100% will it not do it's full damage or is it just not working at all if it's at 0% (or both).
I'm not too sure on this... never actually checked lol. I'm sure when dur reaches 0% the item no longer have any effect until u repair it, but i'm not sure if it works at 1%.
e) about the two different Targets: I haven't really grouped yet but do you always have both active the defensive one and the offensive one, or do you have to switch accordingly?
You can have an offensive target AND a defensive target at the same time. Off. target is the one u do damage towards, and def. target is the one u use rescue skills on.